https://youtu.be/nlYlNF30bVg

"No, little goat," l say. "Go home. Where we are going is not safe for little goats."

The goat bleats belligerently, unimpressed by this argument.

I sigh, stopping and calling loudly, "Mistress Sattler?"

Sattler steps out from the house, and takes in the scene.  "Are you...borrowing the goat?" she inquires, in a very, very non-judgmental tone.

"It jumped the fence and started following," I reply, nudging the goat in her direction.  "You might wanna tether it."

"All right, goat," she says, going and collaring the animal.

Wheeling around my clawfoot I cry, "Halt!" It's an instinctive reaction, and it knocks my more disciplined and structured self prone.

My eyes dart from Sattler to Fondue to Creon and back to the old women.

"Old Mother, I do not have gold to offer you.  I will trade you my dog for the goat."

Primitive unspoken motivations are at work here. 

"Creon is a fine beast.  An excellent worker.  A brave protector.  He will serve you well.  And your farm and family will be an adequate reward for his service."

"Ma'am," Sattler says, "this is a terrible goat.  She's a lousy milker, rude, and has no sense of self-preservation.  That would not be a fair trade for you.  Are you sure?"

I raise an eyebrow.  Some ancient portion of my being it taken aback by the suggestion that the goat is anything but noble.

"I assure you, Old Mother, I do not make this offer frivolously.  I am certain."

I stare at the sergeant incredulously.  "What the fuck.  You taking up farming, cause I thought we was doing a job here."

I raise an eyebrow.  Some ancient portion of my being it taken aback by the suggestion that the goat is anything but noble.

"I assure you, Old Mother, I do not make this offer frivolously.  I am certain."

Sattler, still staring in bafflement, nods agreement.  "All right, then,"  She leaves off the last bit, the clearly implied crazy person.

I shoot a look of mute appeal at the captain.

"Palatinate," I say, quizzically eyeing the horned beast, while leaning in to whisper to the sergeant, "does this creature offer some tactical benefit to our mission?"

"We can eat it if we get hungry, I guess."

"Palatinate," I say, quizzically eyeing the horned beast, while leaning in to whisper to the sergeant, "does this creature offer some tactical benefit to our mission?"

Ignoring the others I turn obediently toward the address of my commanding officer, "We are headed into the mountains.  I know those mountains.  I will need a sure-footed companion.  Creon has served me well for what has been.  She," I nod towards Fondue, "will serve me for what will be."

I turn away from the chaplain and set my eyes on Fondue, "Call this a hunter's instinct.  Trust me on this."

"Hmm... yes... I have seen goats leaping in the Ironroot Mountains, myself. And I trust your judgement on this. The animal has my approval."

"You know that's a dairy goat, right Pepper?" I say.  "Not a mountain goat.  Don't know if you been around 'em much, but it's a farm animal, and it'll be loud."  Also it's kinda mean to just trade away your dog like that, I think, eyeing the critter.

"Excuse me Mistress, may I buy your dog from you? I see that it has had multiple owners, it's a bit old. Could be a bit of mange behind the ear there. Wouldn't have long left to live, last legs and all that. How much would you like?"

"Excuse me Mistress, may I buy your dog from you? I see that it has had multiple owners, it's a bit old. Could be a bit of mange behind the ear there. Wouldn't have long left to live, last legs and all that. How much would you like?"

Creon growls.

I hope of my clawfoot and smartly march Creon over to the old woman.  I turn to Creon, come to attention and salute him, "Dismissed."  After I take off his harness he pads over to Sattler and comes to heel beside her.

"He should have you trained within a few weeks if you are attentive."

I about face and move to fix the harness on Fondue.

[Animal Handling 14+13 = 27]

Being a domestic goat, she's quite tame.  She tolerates this readily.

"Excuse me Mistress, may I buy your dog from you? I see that it has had multiple owners, it's a bit old. Could be a bit of mange behind the ear there. Wouldn't have long left to live, last legs and all that. How much would you like?"

"I would just like you to leave, please," Sattler says, with dignity.

[*pushes fast travel button*]

"OK," l say as we get underway, "so we have a goat now. That's...good, l guess?"